Theres Always One.

2nd Coolest guy at NYCBM

2nd Coolest guy at NYCBM

New York Comic Book Marketplace was AWESOME – but there was this one guy . . .

I am standing next to my table full of “art” when a dour looking middle aged guy stops to look at my work.  He’s got a full bag of purchases and looks like him might be in the market for some of my nonsense from the intensity with which he is studying the table contents.

I let him look for a minute before I pounce on him.

Me- Hey! How are ya?

Him- ok.

He kinda scowls as he looks at stuff.

Me- how do you like the show so far?

Him- It’s ok.

Me- who did you come to see?

Him- George Perez.

Me- Cool! Did you see him?

Him- Yeah.

He kinda frowns because I’m making him interact with another human.

Me- Well how was it?

Him- ok.

Me- Hey if you like any of my stuff, its very affordable! Highly affordable. It’s actually pretty cheap.

Him- That’s ok.

This nice young lady promotes Action Burger and does so very well.

This nice young lady promotes Action Burger and does so very well.

It’s not ok.  He says it like the idea of buying anything from my table tastes like something very sour. Like a rotten orange peel.  Full Disclosure – I have never eaten a rotten orange peel. I am just assuming it tastes very sour. If you have eaten one and wish to correct me please don’t be shy –

Me- What’s ok?

Him- I don’t really see anything I like.

Me- Oh. Well why are you standing here?

Him- just looking.

Me- at stuff you don’t like.

Him- It’s ok.

Would have liked to have gotten to know her better, but the Biters had already gotten her. :(

Would have liked to have gotten to know her better, but the Biters had already gotten her. 😦

Me- if you write your email address down in my notebook, I’ll send you free comic books.

Him- Nahhh.

Me- you don’t like comic books?

Him- I do.

Me- you don’t like FREE comic books?

Him- I do. I just don’t think I want any of your comic books.

Me- Well then why are you standing here?

Him- just looking.

Me- at all of my stuff that you don’t like.

Him- pretty much.

Me- Can I give you some advice?

Him- I guess.

70scostumech5

I have no proof but I have to imagine that this is what the guy looks like on Halloween.

Me- Next time your staring down your nose at something that somebody created out of thin air and was brave enough to share with the general public, if after you feel the need to openly dislike their effort, if by some chance they ask you to give them an email address so they can send you other free stuff that they made that they think you MIGHT just like, maybe just give them a fake email address.  You won’t have to ever hear from them again and when they get the mail bounce back they will assume that it was your bad handwriting and not think about it again. Now, I don’t really care because I have been blessed with a TREMENDOUS ego that could not possibly be scratched by the likes of you, but some of the other artists in the world work very hard on their craft and it takes a lot for them to sit here and open themselves up to judgement all day. Some of them are kinda sensitive and being that you’re sort of an asshole, it’s possible that you might hurt their feelings.  It would be a real shame if your lack of common manners discouraged some young artist from their dream. That’s all.  You should go now. 

Him- ok.

And he waddled away.

Probably to find a 7-11.

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About calmixx

Calmixx is the Pseudonym of New York Artist/Writer Brian Mc- - HEY wait a minute. Why have a cool Pseudonym if you're just gonna tell people it's a Pseudonym? Yeah you can just call me Calmixx for now. Maybe if we have a third date I'll give up the last name but not without dinner. Check out my silly little blog and let me know what you think. Because I care. I really do. Really. Honest. Sorta.
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3 Responses to Theres Always One.

  1. Karolyn says:

    I have no proof but I have to imagine that this guy would have liked an Asian honey badger.

    Hey who doesn’t?

  2. Dave M says:

    So I just realized your Spat pic says the “second coolest guy at the con”. Who was the first?

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